This blog is just a fun way for myself and for Chloe to keep track of our weight loss progress. Hopefully it'll be inspirational to us and maybe to someone else too.
The fat and jolly or skinny bitch is a just a line from the show, The Big C, that I thought was funny. It doesn't mean I agree with it, it's for giggles.
Sort of. Every time I really try to get back into the swing of things, I stop.
So this is short and simple. I’m eating healthier. I’ve completed my first week of Insanity, and I’m feeling good.
Insanity is crazy hard and I can’t complete a whole workout (thankfully it’s designed so you get better at it over time) but I’m sticking with it. A few of the exercises I have to modify (pushups because I have a crap wrist) but I’m sweating and sore so it’s working.
I have only lost a pound.
Motivation is still there…willpower…not so much.
FINALLY somewhat settled into the town house, five days in LA for work didn’t help either. Need to buy groceries and get back to cooking good, healthy foods. My body is so ready for some good nourishment.
Highest weight ever: 258.8
(January 2009)
Began a weight loss regimen in July 2009, resulting in a 50 pound loss.
Lowest weight in the past two years (December 2009 / January 2010): 208
(Dec. 5, 2009)
(I don’t know when exactly this photo was taken but my waist was the smallest it had been in awhile.)
Then sometime in May of 2010 began the climb over the past year and a half, where I gained nearly 40 of those 50 pounds back.
I graduated college and my best friend got married this year. Both things I had promised myself years ago I would be “skinny” for. Didn’t happen.
(May & June 2011, around 236)
Since June I’ve gained and lost the same 10 pounds, never getting back below 236. I have a good week, then a few bad ones, and then repeat. I’m posting these pictures as a reminder and as motivation. It’s easy to not notice the difference and when I first lost that weight I didn’t think I looked any differently. Now that I’ve gained so much back I can see how big of a difference it really was.
New starting point: 246.4
Current weight: 237.4
So here’s to the millionth attempt. All that matters is that I keep trying.
I may have found some motivation. Looked at old photos and realized how thin I was back then and remembered how I felt like I was massive when it was being taken.
How did I get to this point? I can’t let this win forever. I know Christmas is coming, but my Mom and Grandma try to be very mindful of what they put in front of me. Sometimes they say things that are hurtful without trying to be, but I know it all comes from a good place. I go home in two and a half weeks but I can eat healthy and get some exercise in during that time.
No excuses. I’ve been having a healthy week and then a really bad week. Then a healthy day followed by an unhealthy day. Holly reminded me that when I was ready, I’d just be ready. It’s hard to hear that because at one point I did really well, but I can’t keep relying on that “Once upon a time I did really great and lost 50 pounds,” thought. Yes it happened, but that was two years ago come January and I’ve gained 30 of those 50 back.
I think I got my motivation back today. I sure hope so anyways.
Wow, it’s been a month. Not much has changed. I try, I fail, hate myself, try, fail, hate, repeat.
Then sometimes, I feel comfortable in my skin and ask myself “Am I really THAT big?” Then I see a photo, try on some clothes, take measurements and let the reality sink in. From the Fall of 2009 to Spring of 2010 I lost 50 pounds in 6 months. I gained 38 of that back in the past year and a half. It crept up slowly.
So recently I searched for some calorie count tools because some days it felt like what I was eating couldn’t have been THAT much but the number on the scale wasn’t decreasing. Since using it, I have been shocked. It’s been a real eye-opener.
About.com has an incredible calorie counter that is completely free. It lets you pick your target daily calories, factors in your metabolic burn rate, what nutrients you need, where you’ve gone overboard, etc. It let’s you set goals but sticks to the max of 2 pounds a week for weight loss to be considered healthy. There is an iPhone app that is also free.
I’ve lost 10 of those 38 pounds gained back. Only two of those pounds came after starting to use the Calorie Counter but I’ve only been using it since Wednesday. I miss my clothes feeling looser and unfortunately the 10 pounds didn’t make that happen.
Small victories though.
Next goals are not gaining or eating like crazy while I’m in the Florida Keys next Tuesday-Sunday and getting back in the gym.
Happy Saturday.
According to the scale, 4 of those 7 pounds have remained off over the past week and a half as I’ve begun to eat regularly again since having a wisdom tooth removed. That’s a good feeling, makes me happy. I wish they had all stayed off, but I’ll take 4.
I’ve been having Paleo meals and I like the feeling of eating clean. I’ve gotten a stomach ache a few times when I’ve made bad food choices so that only encourages me to keep making good ones.
I keep putting off going back to the gym. I guess the dread of starting all over again since I quit going because I moved back to FL at the end of July. Things have just been so hectic, but there really is no excuse because I have time to go.
Happy Monday all.
One week ago I had a bottom wisdom tooth removed. When I got on the scale this morning it indicated I had “lost” 7 pounds. Oh, how I wish this were true. 7 pounds is enough to make you feel like you have some slight wiggle room in your jeans. Don’t have any of that or feel any different. It’s a fake 7 pound loss because I have been very, very limited on what I’ve been able to eat and haven’t eaten very much at all (which is not healthy) because it’s been very painful.
However, this has also been good in the sense that I am feeling my body want sugar and carbs less since I haven’t been having many (minus some ice cream the first few days). And seeing a number seven pounds less than the number I saw the week before is definite motivation.
Paleo, I’m coming for you. I swear. I’ve promised Holly this too many times not to. Need to get back into the gym as soon as my mouth feels better. It’s weird how the slightest movements like sitting up in bed makes you aware of pressure and pain in your mouth. And I haven’t gone since I left New York which is absolutely pathetic.
Side note: Thank you new followers for following along. I apologize for the lack of posts, things have been extremely hectic with my job the past month. Also, I still haven’t figured out how to follow you back since this is a shared tumblr with my friend Morgan (cough, cough Morgan, please start posting more!!). But hopefully I will soon.
Happy Thursday.
